Why it’s important…

5 07 2009

As far as political issues are concerned, I am of the belief that the fight for gay marriage is, if not the most important battle going on in the country, certainly in the top two or three.  This contradiction may surprise people who know that I am 1) Straight and that I 2) Feel that marriage is, at best, a somewhat silly abstraction based on a promise no sane person can honestly make and, at worst, a relationship destroying arrangement.  So, why so serious about gay marriage, Tim?  I have a variety of reasons, ranging from the noble to the completely selfish.  But let’s just focus on one of the most important reasons today.

This is a video shot recently during Gay Pride in Minneapolis by a friend of a friend (I am assuming I have permission to use it, since it was posted on YouTube).  A man was approached by a group of mostly youngish looking residents, asked if he was gay, and when he responded yes, the following occurred:

Now to be fair here, this could be looked at as relatively tame.  Nobody got hurt, thankfully.  But I don’t know about anyone else, but can you imagine the fear of having this many people following you for two full minutes, screaming at you about how the hate you and your lifestyle.  Frankly, I’m amazed that this gentleman was walking so calmly.  You better believe my skinny white ass would have been going full Forrest Gump out of there.

I think the very telling aspect of this video, though, is the age of the harrassers.  They all look to be under 16, and some of them look like they are in the 11 to 12 range.  Now there are a couple of different ways to interpret that.  One school of thought says, “Ah, kids will be kids, and they will grow out of it.”  Maybe.  However, another way of looking at this is that these kids are being taught (and yes, have no doubt about it, it something that is taught) to hate gays very, very early.  How is this happening?

Here is a clip from Fox News’ Bill O’Reilly show aired during the last presidential election:

(On a quick unrelated side note: Anyone else notice how Bill O’Reilly interviews this woman?  Respectfully, never interrupting her, making sure he chooses his words carefully when paraphrasing her beliefs?  And you just know if this was someone arguing for gay marriage he’d be screaming his head off and not letting them get two words in?  Yeah, fuck you “Fox News” and your Fair and Balanced bullshit…)

If you don’t want to sit and watch the whole thing (I don’t blame you), here are the cliff notes: O’Reilly is interviewing a woman who represents a “Marriage Group” first lobbying to have marriage defined as solely between a man and a woman.  The basic summary of her argument: Well, golly gee, Bill, you know I love the gays just as much as the next person, and that’s why we have laws about civil unions and such and such, and shouldn’t the gays just be happy with that and leave the whole marriage thing to us breeders?  If you have gays marrying each other and being all married and openly happy and whatnot, then I gotta go home and explain to my kids about gay people.!

Exactly.  And that’s why this issue is so important.  By keeping homosexual relationships relegated to “civil unions” or other pseudo-marriage offshoots, we make a statement as a society, whether we intend to or not.  And that statement is: Homosexual relationships aren’t the same as heterosexual relationships.  They are [weird/evil/different/not as important/unhealthy].  And the fact of that matter is, they’re not different.  Make friends with a gay couple, and watch them go through the same cycle of puppy love, happiness, bullshit fighting, annoyance, lust, complacency, and trust issues as any other couple, and then tell me what the difference is.  And as long as we keep marriage as some sort of “sacred” unattainable club that gays aren’t allowed to be a part of, we send a message as a society to all our children that there is something wrong with being gay.  And then, well…see above video.

Now, since I am completely unable to write anything sincere and meaningful without immediately following it up with some lame attempt at humor (a fact which the cast and crew currently working on the Fringe show are well aware), here is a video clip from an old after school special about steroids starring a young Ben Affleck, set to Benny Hill music.  Enjoy.  (Note: This video was stolen from Film Drunk, who probably stole it from someone else.  So, credit where credit is almost due.)

I’m not dead…

27 08 2008

I haven’t posted anything in a while. I was going to write a very crotchety, smart-ass, Andy Rooney styled screed against the Olympics, and how boring and pointless they are. However, K-Bell forced me to watch NBC’s coverage a couple of nights, and maybe I’m just getting old, but I found some of it fairly entertaining. The gymnastics was especially impressive. The track events were fun to watch as well.

Did I just write that? What the hell is wrong with me?

Ah, well. I still think certain aspects of the Olympics are mega-dumb (for instance, how come all these different countries can come together and peacefully decide on the rules of games and compete with each other at them, but they can’t work peacefully to, you know, NOT BLOW EACH OTHER UP WITH BOMBS?), but I would feel hypocritical writing a scathing Olympic piece after watching them. So I’m not going to.

My writing was also interrupted this week by a trip to the hospital. I was diagnosed on Tuesday with melanoma (a form of skin cancer for everyone who, like me, was dumb and didn’t know what that is), told I needed surgery on Wednesday, and spent Thursday getting carved up like a T-Giv’s day bird, and then spent the weekend laying in bed in a drug-induced stupor.

That last part was pretty awesome.

So then I was going to blog about that. But I’m not going to. At least not yet. It’s not that I am shy about it…the problem is that it is long and only kind of funny. Maybe another time. But for now, its enough to say that the whole experience has taught me to appreciate life to the fullest, love every precious human like they were your own child, wake up with a smile, and really develop a personal, intimate relationship with Jesus Christ, my Lord and Savior.

BLAH HA HA HA HA HA! Just kidding about that last part, obviously. It’s business as usual for me from this point forward: bangin’ bitches, drinkin’ beers, and chewin’ gum. And I’m all out of beer and gum. This experience HAS, however, given me a scar on my shoulder that looks like it came off of Frankenstein’s monster, and the knowledge that Vicodin + alcohol = a great nights sleep.

I start work back up on Thursday. Hopefully in the next few days I’ll have something interesting to blog about again. In the meantime, as always, let me plug my girlfriend’s blog, The Pilver. It is one of the hottest blogs on WordPress right now (for serious!) and she is much more prolific than I am. Also, here is one of those adorable LOL Cats pictures for you to look at:

Isn’t that adorable? It’s like he’s saying what cats are thinking, in comically misspelled computer speak!

You love it.